The Morning Was...Damp

This morning it was cold dark and damp. You know one of those mornings like you might see in a werewolf movie out on the Moors in England...you know in black and white. It's the kind of morning that if you stop to take a picture you will get really chilled. So I just kept walking.

I tried to look for positive and hopeful things this morning, but I have to admit...it was hard. I realized I am sad. I am...try to deny it...but I am. I should have known when I picked my music for the walk...it was Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova. I saw these guys perform when we were in Ireland...they were in that movie "Once." The music is...well...sad. So why am I sad? I mean really...shouldn't I be the happiest person on Earth. I have a great wife, a great family, super great grand kids, a great job, a great house and yard, a great shop, great cars, great friends...my life is great. And yet I'm sad. Like the fog enveloping me as I walked I am enveloped in sadness. As I walked I asked God for forgiveness for being sad...I mean doesn't this mean I'm not trusting him? Isn't this a lack of faith? Shouldn't I rejoice in all circumstances? I heard an answer...I mean it wasn't an out loud answer...but an answer.

God told me this morning that my sadness is normal, and completly human. It is much the way Jesus felt when his heart was broken by those who should have known him and yet didn't. He felt a form of sadness...and I do too. I'm sad because of all the pain that people are experiencing these days. So many good godly people who trust God are loosing jobs and really struggling. If people have not lost jobs they are living with the prospect that it could happen any day. It's really bad. It makes me sad.

I am not a man without hope...but it is really hard right now. I just gotta keep walking!