An Old Friend

This morning it was really cold out. Yesterday we had a late snow. Today it was cold and dry but the kind of cold you can feel like a layer against your whole body...I just walked faster hoping I wouldn't notice it. It was so cold...but despite the cold...I was surprisingly warm inside. I was walking with an old friend...John Denver.

I know...he was a bit of a freak. I know...his music was a little sappy. I know...I KNOW!!!! But I loved him. His music brought me such great comfort and great pleasure. So many of my ideals about life and relationships I learned from him. He had a joy and a sweetness about him that seemed to translate into joy and sweetness in my life...how could you not love this guy?

So walking with him this morning was an awesome reunion of sorts. It was nice to listen to his songs again from the perspective of a man who has been walking with Him now for 35 years. Also from the perspective of walking with Tracey now for 32 years (that alone would kill an ordinary man). My life turned out way different than Johns did. I was bummed when he divorced Annie. Her song was the guide for me in selecting my own bride. I wanted someone who "filled up my senses"...all of them...and I found her. I was bummed he was into some weird religion that made him think he was the center of the universe...too bad really. I was bummed he was estranged from his kids...so many of his songs helped me understand what a real father could be like. I was really sad the day I learned he had flown his experimental aircraft into the sea near Monterrey and died. I was sad because I wished he could have experienced more of the life he helped me to discover. There was so much more for him to experience...and yet...tragically it ended. I miss you sometimes John.

So walking with him this morning was really great. I know I only got to walk with his image...his ideal...that which he projected through his songs. I know he could sing about something without ever actually expressing what was really going on in his real life. I know all of this because it is true of me too. How often am I like John and "singing" about something I don't actually experience in my own life. How often am I really honest about who I am?

John, I'm sorry your life ended so soon. Thanks for all the great memories and your friendship over the years. Thanks for your life cause you are still teaching me things. I wish you could have met me and I you. I wish I could have introduced you to Him.

The Eagle and The Hawk

I am the eagle, I live in high country
In rocky cathedrals that reach to the sky
I am the hawk and there's blood on my feathers
But time is still turning they soon will be dry
And all those who see me and all who believe in me
Share in the freedom I feel when I fly
Come dance with the west wind and touch on the mountain tops
Sail o'er the canyons and up to the stars
And reach for the heavens and hope for the future
And all that we can be, not just what we are